CALLING ALL LITERARY MINDS!

I am trying to compose a coffee table book on the topic of EXCUSES.? To add an original flavor to my project
I am attempting to derive my research entirely from people I come in contact with on the Net.
If you have, or know of, any interesting, unique, or even bizarre excuses, and would like to participate in this experiment
in creative literature, please reply to this message with your excuse.? Any excuse that is used in the published version will
receive full literary credit.? Thank you in advance for helping a fellow netizen.
Long live free speech!

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                                                                 Sincerely yours,

???????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????? Jason