OT-What A life I Am Having!! 
Author Message
 OT-What A life I Am Having!!

oh brav ...... cracks me up!  hehe!  


I was on my way to the post office yesterday morning to pick up my case of
free M&Ms (sent to me because I forwarded an e-mail to five other people
celebrating the fact that the year 2000 is "MM" in  Roman numerals) when I
ran into a friend whose  neighbor, a young man, was home recovering from
having been served a rat in  his bucket of Kentucky Fried Chicken   (which
is predictable since, as everyone knows, there's no actual chicken in
Kentucky Fried Chicken, which is why the government made them change their
name to KFC).

Anyway, this morning I went to decided  to take a nap before I left and when
I awoke I was in my bathtub and it was full of ice and  I was sore all over,
and when I got out of the tub, I realized
that MY KIDNEY HAD BEEN STOLEN.    I saw a note on my mirror that said "Call
911!"  but I was afraid to use my phone because it was connected to my
computer and there was a virus on my computer that would destroy my hard
drive if I opened an e-mail entitled "Join the crew!"   I knew it wasn't a
hoax
because I have a friend who is a computer programmer who is working on
software to prevent a global disaster in which all the computers get
together and distribute the last week in a mass e-mail from BILL GATES
HIMSELF (who was also promising me a free Disney World vacation and $5,000
if I would forward
the e-mail to everyone I know.)

So I went down the street & then tried to call 911 from a pay phone to
report my missing kidney but a voice on the line first asked me to press #90
which unwittingly gave a bandit full access to the phone line at the MY
expense. Then reaching into the coin-return slot, I got jabbed with an
HIV-infected needle around which was wrapped a note that said, "Welcome to
the world of AIDS."

Luckily I was only a few blocks from the hospital - the one where the last
wish of that little boy who is dying of cancer is for everyone in the world
to send him an e-mail and the American Cancer  Society has agreed to pay him
a nickel for every e-mail he receives.   I sent him two e-mails and one of
them was a bunch of x's and o's in the shape of an angel (if you get it and
forward it to more than 10 people, you will have good luck but for 10 people
only you will only have OK luck and if you send it to fewer than 10 people
you will have BAD LUCK FOR SEVEN YEARS).

So anyway, I tried to drive myself to the hospital tonight;  but on the way,
I noticed another car driving without its lights on.   To be helpful, I
flashed my lights at him and was promptly shot as part of a gang initiation.

Now YOU have to send THIS to all the friends who send you their junk mail
and you will receive 4 green M&Ms -- if you don't,  the owner of Proctor and
Gamble will report you to his Satanist friends  and you will have more bad
luck:  you will get sick from the Sodium Laureth Sulfate in your shampoo,
your spouse/mate will develop a skin rash from using the antiperspirant
which clogs the pores under your arms, you will get deathly sick from not
wiping soda cans with soap and water before drinking from them, and even  if
you do clean the can top carefully, the aspartame in the soda will give you
multiple sclerosis...   and the U.S. government will put a tax on your
e-mails forever.    I know this is all true 'cause I read it on the
Internet. & some of it actually happened to me.
--
Brav...

I got to keep movin'
   I've got to keep movin'
   blues fallin' down like hail
   blues fallin' down like hail
Umm mmm mmm mmm
  blues fallin' down like hail
  blues fallin' down like hail
And the days keeps on worryin' me
   there's a hellhound on my trail
   hellhound on my trail
   hellhound on my trail

*Hellhound On My Trail*
    ~Robert Johnson~
(found my old sig)



Mon, 16 Sep 2002 03:00:00 GMT
 OT-What A life I Am Having!!

Aloha Brav,

Priceless post!! Combines all the most clooless 'net topics into one:
urban legends, virus hoax warnings, chain emails, cutesy emoticon
figures sent to everyone in the known world, ... and a healthy dose of
paranoia, too. {::grinning::}  I don't think you missed a single one.

I appreciate your sense of humor, and I'm glad you found your old sig.
line - (BTW, you *do* know what happened to Robert Johnson at the
Crossroads, of course (no urban legend there, uh uh - no way, nope!!)).

warm aloha,
--
Leola

~~ What if the hokey pokey really *is* what it's all about?~~

Quote:

> I was on my way to the post office yesterday morning to pick up my case of
> free M&Ms (sent to me because I forwarded an e-mail to five other people
> celebrating the fact that the year 2000 is "MM" in  Roman numerals) when I
> ran into a friend whose  neighbor, a young man, was home recovering from
> having been served a rat in  his bucket of Kentucky Fried Chicken   (which
> is predictable since, as everyone knows, there's no actual chicken in
> Kentucky Fried Chicken, which is why the government made them change their
> name to KFC).

> Anyway, this morning I went to decided  to take a nap before I left and when
> I awoke I was in my bathtub and it was full of ice and  I was sore all over,
> and when I got out of the tub, I realized
> that MY KIDNEY HAD BEEN STOLEN.    I saw a note on my mirror that said "Call
> 911!"  but I was afraid to use my phone because it was connected to my
> computer and there was a virus on my computer that would destroy my hard
> drive if I opened an e-mail entitled "Join the crew!"   I knew it wasn't a
> hoax
> because I have a friend who is a computer programmer who is working on
> software to prevent a global disaster in which all the computers get
> together and distribute the last week in a mass e-mail from BILL GATES
> HIMSELF (who was also promising me a free Disney World vacation and $5,000
> if I would forward
> the e-mail to everyone I know.)

> So I went down the street & then tried to call 911 from a pay phone to
> report my missing kidney but a voice on the line first asked me to press #90
> which unwittingly gave a bandit full access to the phone line at the MY
> expense. Then reaching into the coin-return slot, I got jabbed with an
> HIV-infected needle around which was wrapped a note that said, "Welcome to
> the world of AIDS."

> Luckily I was only a few blocks from the hospital - the one where the last
> wish of that little boy who is dying of cancer is for everyone in the world
> to send him an e-mail and the American Cancer  Society has agreed to pay him
> a nickel for every e-mail he receives.   I sent him two e-mails and one of
> them was a bunch of x's and o's in the shape of an angel (if you get it and
> forward it to more than 10 people, you will have good luck but for 10 people
> only you will only have OK luck and if you send it to fewer than 10 people
> you will have BAD LUCK FOR SEVEN YEARS).

> So anyway, I tried to drive myself to the hospital tonight;  but on the way,
> I noticed another car driving without its lights on.   To be helpful, I
> flashed my lights at him and was promptly shot as part of a gang initiation.

> Now YOU have to send THIS to all the friends who send you their junk mail
> and you will receive 4 green M&Ms -- if you don't,  the owner of Proctor and
> Gamble will report you to his Satanist friends  and you will have more bad
> luck:  you will get sick from the Sodium Laureth Sulfate in your shampoo,
> your spouse/mate will develop a skin rash from using the antiperspirant
> which clogs the pores under your arms, you will get deathly sick from not
> wiping soda cans with soap and water before drinking from them, and even  if
> you do clean the can top carefully, the aspartame in the soda will give you
> multiple sclerosis...   and the U.S. government will put a tax on your
> e-mails forever.    I know this is all true 'cause I read it on the
> Internet. & some of it actually happened to me.
> --
> Brav...

> I got to keep movin'
>    I've got to keep movin'
>    blues fallin' down like hail
>    blues fallin' down like hail
> Umm mmm mmm mmm
>   blues fallin' down like hail
>   blues fallin' down like hail
> And the days keeps on worryin' me
>    there's a hellhound on my trail
>    hellhound on my trail
>    hellhound on my trail

> *Hellhound On My Trail*
>     ~Robert Johnson~
> (found my old sig)



Mon, 16 Sep 2002 03:00:00 GMT
 OT-What A life I Am Having!!
message on local baptist church marquee"you can't stop, drop, and roll in
hell"

Quote:

> Aloha Brav,

> Priceless post!! Combines all the most clooless 'net topics into one:
> urban legends, virus hoax warnings, chain emails, cutesy emoticon
> figures sent to everyone in the known world, ... and a healthy dose of
> paranoia, too. {::grinning::}  I don't think you missed a single one.

> I appreciate your sense of humor, and I'm glad you found your old sig.
> line - (BTW, you *do* know what happened to Robert Johnson at the
> Crossroads, of course (no urban legend there, uh uh - no way, nope!!)).

> warm aloha,
> --
> Leola

> ~~ What if the hokey pokey really *is* what it's all about?~~


> > I was on my way to the post office yesterday morning to pick up my case
of
> > free M&Ms (sent to me because I forwarded an e-mail to five other people
> > celebrating the fact that the year 2000 is "MM" in  Roman numerals) when
I
> > ran into a friend whose  neighbor, a young man, was home recovering from
> > having been served a rat in  his bucket of Kentucky Fried Chicken
(which
> > is predictable since, as everyone knows, there's no actual chicken in
> > Kentucky Fried Chicken, which is why the government made them change
their
> > name to KFC).

> > Anyway, this morning I went to decided  to take a nap before I left and
when
> > I awoke I was in my bathtub and it was full of ice and  I was sore all
over,
> > and when I got out of the tub, I realized
> > that MY KIDNEY HAD BEEN STOLEN.    I saw a note on my mirror that said
"Call
> > 911!"  but I was afraid to use my phone because it was connected to my
> > computer and there was a virus on my computer that would destroy my hard
> > drive if I opened an e-mail entitled "Join the crew!"   I knew it wasn't
a
> > hoax
> > because I have a friend who is a computer programmer who is working on
> > software to prevent a global disaster in which all the computers get
> > together and distribute the last week in a mass e-mail from BILL GATES
> > HIMSELF (who was also promising me a free Disney World vacation and
$5,000
> > if I would forward
> > the e-mail to everyone I know.)

> > So I went down the street & then tried to call 911 from a pay phone to
> > report my missing kidney but a voice on the line first asked me to press
#90
> > which unwittingly gave a bandit full access to the phone line at the MY
> > expense. Then reaching into the coin-return slot, I got jabbed with an
> > HIV-infected needle around which was wrapped a note that said, "Welcome
to
> > the world of AIDS."

> > Luckily I was only a few blocks from the hospital - the one where the
last
> > wish of that little boy who is dying of cancer is for everyone in the
world
> > to send him an e-mail and the American Cancer  Society has agreed to pay
him
> > a nickel for every e-mail he receives.   I sent him two e-mails and one
of
> > them was a bunch of x's and o's in the shape of an angel (if you get it
and
> > forward it to more than 10 people, you will have good luck but for 10
people
> > only you will only have OK luck and if you send it to fewer than 10
people
> > you will have BAD LUCK FOR SEVEN YEARS).

> > So anyway, I tried to drive myself to the hospital tonight;  but on the
way,
> > I noticed another car driving without its lights on.   To be helpful, I
> > flashed my lights at him and was promptly shot as part of a gang
initiation.

> > Now YOU have to send THIS to all the friends who send you their junk
mail
> > and you will receive 4 green M&Ms -- if you don't,  the owner of Proctor
and
> > Gamble will report you to his Satanist friends  and you will have more
bad
> > luck:  you will get sick from the Sodium Laureth Sulfate in your
shampoo,
> > your spouse/mate will develop a skin rash from using the antiperspirant
> > which clogs the pores under your arms, you will get deathly sick from
not
> > wiping soda cans with soap and water before drinking from them, and even
if
> > you do clean the can top carefully, the aspartame in the soda will give
you
> > multiple sclerosis...   and the U.S. government will put a tax on your
> > e-mails forever.    I know this is all true 'cause I read it on the
> > Internet. & some of it actually happened to me.
> > --
> > Brav...

> > I got to keep movin'
> >    I've got to keep movin'
> >    blues fallin' down like hail
> >    blues fallin' down like hail
> > Umm mmm mmm mmm
> >   blues fallin' down like hail
> >   blues fallin' down like hail
> > And the days keeps on worryin' me
> >    there's a hellhound on my trail
> >    hellhound on my trail
> >    hellhound on my trail

> > *Hellhound On My Trail*
> >     ~Robert Johnson~
> > (found my old sig)



Tue, 17 Sep 2002 03:00:00 GMT
 OT-What A life I Am Having!!
Thanks leola but I didnt write it I just creatively acquired it......glad it
provided a chuckle though.


Quote:

> Aloha Brav,

> Priceless post!! Combines all the most clooless 'net topics into one:
> urban legends, virus hoax warnings, chain emails, cutesy emoticon
> figures sent to everyone in the known world, ... and a healthy dose of
> paranoia, too. {::grinning::}  I don't think you missed a single one.

> I appreciate your sense of humor, and I'm glad you found your old sig.
> line - (BTW, you *do* know what happened to Robert Johnson at the
> Crossroads, of course (no urban legend there, uh uh - no way, nope!!)).

of course I do I saw it in a movie so it must be true....<smirk>

Quote:

> warm aloha,
> --
> Leola

> ~~ What if the hokey pokey really *is* what it's all about?~~

Wouldnt surprise me at all......I mean really.....look at the Life I am
Having<g>

--
Brav
Red meat is NOT bad for you.
 Now, blue-green meat,
 that's REALLY BAD for you.
  --Tommy Smothers--



Wed, 18 Sep 2002 03:00:00 GMT
 OT-What A life I Am Having!!
I will wait to test that theory thanks.....


Quote:
> message on local baptist church marquee"you can't stop, drop, and roll in
> hell"


> > Aloha Brav,

> > Priceless post!! Combines all the most clooless 'net topics into one:
> > urban legends, virus hoax warnings, chain emails, cutesy emoticon
> > figures sent to everyone in the known world, ... and a healthy dose of
> > paranoia, too. {::grinning::}  I don't think you missed a single one.

> > I appreciate your sense of humor, and I'm glad you found your old sig.
> > line - (BTW, you *do* know what happened to Robert Johnson at the
> > Crossroads, of course (no urban legend there, uh uh - no way, nope!!)).

> > warm aloha,
> > --
> > Leola

> > ~~ What if the hokey pokey really *is* what it's all about?~~


> > > I was on my way to the post office yesterday morning to pick up my
case
> of
> > > free M&Ms (sent to me because I forwarded an e-mail to five other
people
> > > celebrating the fact that the year 2000 is "MM" in  Roman numerals)
when
> I
> > > ran into a friend whose  neighbor, a young man, was home recovering
from
> > > having been served a rat in  his bucket of Kentucky Fried Chicken
> (which
> > > is predictable since, as everyone knows, there's no actual chicken in
> > > Kentucky Fried Chicken, which is why the government made them change
> their
> > > name to KFC).

> > > Anyway, this morning I went to decided  to take a nap before I left
and
> when
> > > I awoke I was in my bathtub and it was full of ice and  I was sore all
> over,
> > > and when I got out of the tub, I realized
> > > that MY KIDNEY HAD BEEN STOLEN.    I saw a note on my mirror that said
> "Call
> > > 911!"  but I was afraid to use my phone because it was connected to my
> > > computer and there was a virus on my computer that would destroy my
hard
> > > drive if I opened an e-mail entitled "Join the crew!"   I knew it
wasn't
> a
> > > hoax
> > > because I have a friend who is a computer programmer who is working on
> > > software to prevent a global disaster in which all the computers get
> > > together and distribute the last week in a mass e-mail from BILL GATES
> > > HIMSELF (who was also promising me a free Disney World vacation and
> $5,000
> > > if I would forward
> > > the e-mail to everyone I know.)

> > > So I went down the street & then tried to call 911 from a pay phone to
> > > report my missing kidney but a voice on the line first asked me to
press
> #90
> > > which unwittingly gave a bandit full access to the phone line at the
MY
> > > expense. Then reaching into the coin-return slot, I got jabbed with an
> > > HIV-infected needle around which was wrapped a note that said,
"Welcome
> to
> > > the world of AIDS."

> > > Luckily I was only a few blocks from the hospital - the one where the
> last
> > > wish of that little boy who is dying of cancer is for everyone in the
> world
> > > to send him an e-mail and the American Cancer  Society has agreed to
pay
> him
> > > a nickel for every e-mail he receives.   I sent him two e-mails and
one
> of
> > > them was a bunch of x's and o's in the shape of an angel (if you get
it
> and
> > > forward it to more than 10 people, you will have good luck but for 10
> people
> > > only you will only have OK luck and if you send it to fewer than 10
> people
> > > you will have BAD LUCK FOR SEVEN YEARS).

> > > So anyway, I tried to drive myself to the hospital tonight;  but on
the
> way,
> > > I noticed another car driving without its lights on.   To be helpful,
I
> > > flashed my lights at him and was promptly shot as part of a gang
> initiation.

> > > Now YOU have to send THIS to all the friends who send you their junk
> mail
> > > and you will receive 4 green M&Ms -- if you don't,  the owner of
Proctor
> and
> > > Gamble will report you to his Satanist friends  and you will have more
> bad
> > > luck:  you will get sick from the Sodium Laureth Sulfate in your
> shampoo,
> > > your spouse/mate will develop a skin rash from using the
antiperspirant
> > > which clogs the pores under your arms, you will get deathly sick from
> not
> > > wiping soda cans with soap and water before drinking from them, and
even
> if
> > > you do clean the can top carefully, the aspartame in the soda will
give
> you
> > > multiple sclerosis...   and the U.S. government will put a tax on your
> > > e-mails forever.    I know this is all true 'cause I read it on the
> > > Internet. & some of it actually happened to me.
> > > --
> > > Brav...

> > > I got to keep movin'
> > >    I've got to keep movin'
> > >    blues fallin' down like hail
> > >    blues fallin' down like hail
> > > Umm mmm mmm mmm
> > >   blues fallin' down like hail
> > >   blues fallin' down like hail
> > > And the days keeps on worryin' me
> > >    there's a hellhound on my trail
> > >    hellhound on my trail
> > >    hellhound on my trail

> > > *Hellhound On My Trail*
> > >     ~Robert Johnson~
> > > (found my old sig)



Wed, 18 Sep 2002 03:00:00 GMT
 OT-What A life I Am Having!!
I sometimes wonder if this isn't hell.......

Quote:
> i've always imagined hell to be a cold, cold place, like where scrooge
went
> in albert finneys' version of a Christmas Carol.


> > I will wait to test that theory thanks.....



> > > message on local baptist church marquee"you can't stop, drop, and roll
> in
> > > hell"


> > > > Aloha Brav,

> > > > Priceless post!! Combines all the most clooless 'net topics into
one:
> > > > urban legends, virus hoax warnings, chain emails, cutesy emoticon
> > > > figures sent to everyone in the known world, ... and a healthy dose
of
> > > > paranoia, too. {::grinning::}  I don't think you missed a single
one.

> > > > I appreciate your sense of humor, and I'm glad you found your old
sig.
> > > > line - (BTW, you *do* know what happened to Robert Johnson at the
> > > > Crossroads, of course (no urban legend there, uh uh - no way,
> nope!!)).

> > > > warm aloha,
> > > > --
> > > > Leola

> > > > ~~ What if the hokey pokey really *is* what it's all about?~~


> > > > > I was on my way to the post office yesterday morning to pick up my
> > case
> > > of
> > > > > free M&Ms (sent to me because I forwarded an e-mail to five other
> > people
> > > > > celebrating the fact that the year 2000 is "MM" in  Roman
numerals)
> > when
> > > I
> > > > > ran into a friend whose  neighbor, a young man, was home
recovering
> > from
> > > > > having been served a rat in  his bucket of Kentucky Fried Chicken
> > > (which
> > > > > is predictable since, as everyone knows, there's no actual chicken
> in
> > > > > Kentucky Fried Chicken, which is why the government made them
change
> > > their
> > > > > name to KFC).

> > > > > Anyway, this morning I went to decided  to take a nap before I
left
> > and
> > > when
> > > > > I awoke I was in my bathtub and it was full of ice and  I was sore
> all
> > > over,
> > > > > and when I got out of the tub, I realized
> > > > > that MY KIDNEY HAD BEEN STOLEN.    I saw a note on my mirror that
> said
> > > "Call
> > > > > 911!"  but I was afraid to use my phone because it was connected
to
> my
> > > > > computer and there was a virus on my computer that would destroy
my
> > hard
> > > > > drive if I opened an e-mail entitled "Join the crew!"   I knew it
> > wasn't
> > > a
> > > > > hoax
> > > > > because I have a friend who is a computer programmer who is
working
> on
> > > > > software to prevent a global disaster in which all the computers
get
> > > > > together and distribute the last week in a mass e-mail from BILL
> GATES
> > > > > HIMSELF (who was also promising me a free Disney World vacation
and
> > > $5,000
> > > > > if I would forward
> > > > > the e-mail to everyone I know.)

> > > > > So I went down the street & then tried to call 911 from a pay
phone
> to
> > > > > report my missing kidney but a voice on the line first asked me to
> > press
> > > #90
> > > > > which unwittingly gave a bandit full access to the phone line at
the
> > MY
> > > > > expense. Then reaching into the coin-return slot, I got jabbed
with
> an
> > > > > HIV-infected needle around which was wrapped a note that said,
> > "Welcome
> > > to
> > > > > the world of AIDS."

> > > > > Luckily I was only a few blocks from the hospital - the one where
> the
> > > last
> > > > > wish of that little boy who is dying of cancer is for everyone in
> the
> > > world
> > > > > to send him an e-mail and the American Cancer  Society has agreed
to
> > pay
> > > him
> > > > > a nickel for every e-mail he receives.   I sent him two e-mails
and
> > one
> > > of
> > > > > them was a bunch of x's and o's in the shape of an angel (if you
get
> > it
> > > and
> > > > > forward it to more than 10 people, you will have good luck but for
> 10
> > > people
> > > > > only you will only have OK luck and if you send it to fewer than
10
> > > people
> > > > > you will have BAD LUCK FOR SEVEN YEARS).

> > > > > So anyway, I tried to drive myself to the hospital tonight;  but
on
> > the
> > > way,
> > > > > I noticed another car driving without its lights on.   To be
> helpful,
> > I
> > > > > flashed my lights at him and was promptly shot as part of a gang
> > > initiation.

> > > > > Now YOU have to send THIS to all the friends who send you their
junk
> > > mail
> > > > > and you will receive 4 green M&Ms -- if you don't,  the owner of
> > Proctor
> > > and
> > > > > Gamble will report you to his Satanist friends  and you will have
> more
> > > bad
> > > > > luck:  you will get sick from the Sodium Laureth Sulfate in your
> > > shampoo,
> > > > > your spouse/mate will develop a skin rash from using the
> > antiperspirant
> > > > > which clogs the pores under your arms, you will get deathly sick
> from
> > > not
> > > > > wiping soda cans with soap and water before drinking from them,
and
> > even
> > > if
> > > > > you do clean the can top carefully, the aspartame in the soda will
> > give
> > > you
> > > > > multiple sclerosis...   and the U.S. government will put a tax on
> your
> > > > > e-mails forever.    I know this is all true 'cause I read it on
the
> > > > > Internet. & some of it actually happened to me.
> > > > > --
> > > > > Brav...

> > > > > I got to keep movin'
> > > > >    I've got to keep movin'
> > > > >    blues fallin' down like hail
> > > > >    blues fallin' down like hail
> > > > > Umm mmm mmm mmm
> > > > >   blues fallin' down like hail
> > > > >   blues fallin' down like hail
> > > > > And the days keeps on worryin' me
> > > > >    there's a hellhound on my trail
> > > > >    hellhound on my trail
> > > > >    hellhound on my trail

> > > > > *Hellhound On My Trail*
> > > > >     ~Robert Johnson~
> > > > > (found my old sig)



Wed, 18 Sep 2002 03:00:00 GMT
 OT-What A life I Am Having!!
i've always imagined hell to be a cold, cold place, like where scrooge went
in albert finneys' version of a Christmas Carol.

Quote:
> I will wait to test that theory thanks.....



> > message on local baptist church marquee"you can't stop, drop, and roll
in
> > hell"


> > > Aloha Brav,

> > > Priceless post!! Combines all the most clooless 'net topics into one:
> > > urban legends, virus hoax warnings, chain emails, cutesy emoticon
> > > figures sent to everyone in the known world, ... and a healthy dose of
> > > paranoia, too. {::grinning::}  I don't think you missed a single one.

> > > I appreciate your sense of humor, and I'm glad you found your old sig.
> > > line - (BTW, you *do* know what happened to Robert Johnson at the
> > > Crossroads, of course (no urban legend there, uh uh - no way,
nope!!)).

> > > warm aloha,
> > > --
> > > Leola

> > > ~~ What if the hokey pokey really *is* what it's all about?~~


> > > > I was on my way to the post office yesterday morning to pick up my
> case
> > of
> > > > free M&Ms (sent to me because I forwarded an e-mail to five other
> people
> > > > celebrating the fact that the year 2000 is "MM" in  Roman numerals)
> when
> > I
> > > > ran into a friend whose  neighbor, a young man, was home recovering
> from
> > > > having been served a rat in  his bucket of Kentucky Fried Chicken
> > (which
> > > > is predictable since, as everyone knows, there's no actual chicken
in
> > > > Kentucky Fried Chicken, which is why the government made them change
> > their
> > > > name to KFC).

> > > > Anyway, this morning I went to decided  to take a nap before I left
> and
> > when
> > > > I awoke I was in my bathtub and it was full of ice and  I was sore
all
> > over,
> > > > and when I got out of the tub, I realized
> > > > that MY KIDNEY HAD BEEN STOLEN.    I saw a note on my mirror that
said
> > "Call
> > > > 911!"  but I was afraid to use my phone because it was connected to
my
> > > > computer and there was a virus on my computer that would destroy my
> hard
> > > > drive if I opened an e-mail entitled "Join the crew!"   I knew it
> wasn't
> > a
> > > > hoax
> > > > because I have a friend who is a computer programmer who is working
on
> > > > software to prevent a global disaster in which all the computers get
> > > > together and distribute the last week in a mass e-mail from BILL
GATES
> > > > HIMSELF (who was also promising me a free Disney World vacation and
> > $5,000
> > > > if I would forward
> > > > the e-mail to everyone I know.)

> > > > So I went down the street & then tried to call 911 from a pay phone
to
> > > > report my missing kidney but a voice on the line first asked me to
> press
> > #90
> > > > which unwittingly gave a bandit full access to the phone line at the
> MY
> > > > expense. Then reaching into the coin-return slot, I got jabbed with
an
> > > > HIV-infected needle around which was wrapped a note that said,
> "Welcome
> > to
> > > > the world of AIDS."

> > > > Luckily I was only a few blocks from the hospital - the one where
the
> > last
> > > > wish of that little boy who is dying of cancer is for everyone in
the
> > world
> > > > to send him an e-mail and the American Cancer  Society has agreed to
> pay
> > him
> > > > a nickel for every e-mail he receives.   I sent him two e-mails and
> one
> > of
> > > > them was a bunch of x's and o's in the shape of an angel (if you get
> it
> > and
> > > > forward it to more than 10 people, you will have good luck but for
10
> > people
> > > > only you will only have OK luck and if you send it to fewer than 10
> > people
> > > > you will have BAD LUCK FOR SEVEN YEARS).

> > > > So anyway, I tried to drive myself to the hospital tonight;  but on
> the
> > way,
> > > > I noticed another car driving without its lights on.   To be
helpful,
> I
> > > > flashed my lights at him and was promptly shot as part of a gang
> > initiation.

> > > > Now YOU have to send THIS to all the friends who send you their junk
> > mail
> > > > and you will receive 4 green M&Ms -- if you don't,  the owner of
> Proctor
> > and
> > > > Gamble will report you to his Satanist friends  and you will have
more
> > bad
> > > > luck:  you will get sick from the Sodium Laureth Sulfate in your
> > shampoo,
> > > > your spouse/mate will develop a skin rash from using the
> antiperspirant
> > > > which clogs the pores under your arms, you will get deathly sick
from
> > not
> > > > wiping soda cans with soap and water before drinking from them, and
> even
> > if
> > > > you do clean the can top carefully, the aspartame in the soda will
> give
> > you
> > > > multiple sclerosis...   and the U.S. government will put a tax on
your
> > > > e-mails forever.    I know this is all true 'cause I read it on the
> > > > Internet. & some of it actually happened to me.
> > > > --
> > > > Brav...

> > > > I got to keep movin'
> > > >    I've got to keep movin'
> > > >    blues fallin' down like hail
> > > >    blues fallin' down like hail
> > > > Umm mmm mmm mmm
> > > >   blues fallin' down like hail
> > > >   blues fallin' down like hail
> > > > And the days keeps on worryin' me
> > > >    there's a hellhound on my trail
> > > >    hellhound on my trail
> > > >    hellhound on my trail

> > > > *Hellhound On My Trail*
> > > >     ~Robert Johnson~
> > > > (found my old sig)



Thu, 19 Sep 2002 04:00:00 GMT
 OT-What A life I Am Having!!
this is a place where our spirits go for vacation. it's all a test to
toughen us up. you die and wake up and say"that was a good one, or that was
a bad one," we're on the train,like the guy wrote last week

Quote:
> I sometimes wonder if this isn't hell.......


> > i've always imagined hell to be a cold, cold place, like where scrooge
> went
> > in albert finneys' version of a Christmas Carol.


> > > I will wait to test that theory thanks.....



> > > > message on local baptist church marquee"you can't stop, drop, and
roll
> > in
> > > > hell"


> > > > > Aloha Brav,

> > > > > Priceless post!! Combines all the most clooless 'net topics into
> one:
> > > > > urban legends, virus hoax warnings, chain emails, cutesy emoticon
> > > > > figures sent to everyone in the known world, ... and a healthy
dose
> of
> > > > > paranoia, too. {::grinning::}  I don't think you missed a single
> one.

> > > > > I appreciate your sense of humor, and I'm glad you found your old
> sig.
> > > > > line - (BTW, you *do* know what happened to Robert Johnson at the
> > > > > Crossroads, of course (no urban legend there, uh uh - no way,
> > nope!!)).

> > > > > warm aloha,
> > > > > --
> > > > > Leola

> > > > > ~~ What if the hokey pokey really *is* what it's all about?~~


> > > > > > I was on my way to the post office yesterday morning to pick up
my
> > > case
> > > > of
> > > > > > free M&Ms (sent to me because I forwarded an e-mail to five
other
> > > people
> > > > > > celebrating the fact that the year 2000 is "MM" in  Roman
> numerals)
> > > when
> > > > I
> > > > > > ran into a friend whose  neighbor, a young man, was home
> recovering
> > > from
> > > > > > having been served a rat in  his bucket of Kentucky Fried
Chicken
> > > > (which
> > > > > > is predictable since, as everyone knows, there's no actual
chicken
> > in
> > > > > > Kentucky Fried Chicken, which is why the government made them
> change
> > > > their
> > > > > > name to KFC).

> > > > > > Anyway, this morning I went to decided  to take a nap before I
> left
> > > and
> > > > when
> > > > > > I awoke I was in my bathtub and it was full of ice and  I was
sore
> > all
> > > > over,
> > > > > > and when I got out of the tub, I realized
> > > > > > that MY KIDNEY HAD BEEN STOLEN.    I saw a note on my mirror
that
> > said
> > > > "Call
> > > > > > 911!"  but I was afraid to use my phone because it was connected
> to
> > my
> > > > > > computer and there was a virus on my computer that would destroy
> my
> > > hard
> > > > > > drive if I opened an e-mail entitled "Join the crew!"   I knew
it
> > > wasn't
> > > > a
> > > > > > hoax
> > > > > > because I have a friend who is a computer programmer who is
> working
> > on
> > > > > > software to prevent a global disaster in which all the computers
> get
> > > > > > together and distribute the last week in a mass e-mail from BILL
> > GATES
> > > > > > HIMSELF (who was also promising me a free Disney World vacation
> and
> > > > $5,000
> > > > > > if I would forward
> > > > > > the e-mail to everyone I know.)

> > > > > > So I went down the street & then tried to call 911 from a pay
> phone
> > to
> > > > > > report my missing kidney but a voice on the line first asked me
to
> > > press
> > > > #90
> > > > > > which unwittingly gave a bandit full access to the phone line at
> the
> > > MY
> > > > > > expense. Then reaching into the coin-return slot, I got jabbed
> with
> > an
> > > > > > HIV-infected needle around which was wrapped a note that said,
> > > "Welcome
> > > > to
> > > > > > the world of AIDS."

> > > > > > Luckily I was only a few blocks from the hospital - the one
where
> > the
> > > > last
> > > > > > wish of that little boy who is dying of cancer is for everyone
in
> > the
> > > > world
> > > > > > to send him an e-mail and the American Cancer  Society has
agreed
> to
> > > pay
> > > > him
> > > > > > a nickel for every e-mail he receives.   I sent him two e-mails
> and
> > > one
> > > > of
> > > > > > them was a bunch of x's and o's in the shape of an angel (if you
> get
> > > it
> > > > and
> > > > > > forward it to more than 10 people, you will have good luck but
for
> > 10
> > > > people
> > > > > > only you will only have OK luck and if you send it to fewer than
> 10
> > > > people
> > > > > > you will have BAD LUCK FOR SEVEN YEARS).

> > > > > > So anyway, I tried to drive myself to the hospital tonight;  but
> on
> > > the
> > > > way,
> > > > > > I noticed another car driving without its lights on.   To be
> > helpful,
> > > I
> > > > > > flashed my lights at him and was promptly shot as part of a gang
> > > > initiation.

> > > > > > Now YOU have to send THIS to all the friends who send you their
> junk
> > > > mail
> > > > > > and you will receive 4 green M&Ms -- if you don't,  the owner of
> > > Proctor
> > > > and
> > > > > > Gamble will report you to his Satanist friends  and you will
have
> > more
> > > > bad
> > > > > > luck:  you will get sick from the Sodium Laureth Sulfate in your
> > > > shampoo,
> > > > > > your spouse/mate will develop a skin rash from using the
> > > antiperspirant
> > > > > > which clogs the pores under your arms, you will get deathly sick
> > from
> > > > not
> > > > > > wiping soda cans with soap and water before drinking from them,
> and
> > > even
> > > > if
> > > > > > you do clean the can top carefully, the aspartame in the soda
will
> > > give
> > > > you
> > > > > > multiple sclerosis...   and the U.S. government will put a tax
on
> > your
> > > > > > e-mails forever.    I know this is all true 'cause I read it on
> the
> > > > > > Internet. & some of it actually happened to me.
> > > > > > --
> > > > > > Brav...

> > > > > > I got to keep movin'
> > > > > >    I've got to keep movin'
> > > > > >    blues fallin' down like hail
> > > > > >    blues fallin' down like hail
> > > > > > Umm mmm mmm mmm
> > > > > >   blues fallin' down like hail
> > > > > >   blues fallin' down like hail
> > > > > > And the days keeps on worryin' me
> > > > > >    there's a hellhound on my trail
> > > > > >    hellhound on my trail
> > > > > >    hellhound on my trail

> > > > > > *Hellhound On My Trail*
> > > > > >     ~Robert Johnson~
> > > > > > (found my old sig)



Thu, 19 Sep 2002 04:00:00 GMT
 OT-What A life I Am Having!!
This is no urban legend! I used to work at a VERY large financial
institution and we CONSTANTLY had phone calls where someone would say
they were a repair technician from the phone company and request that we
press 90 and hang up so they could "test the line." A lot of people fell
for it. I finally got fed up and traced the calls. They were coming from
a payphone in a prison in upstate New York. I spoke to someone in
administration there, but they told me they couldn't do anything about
it because that would be interfering with the prisoners' civil rights!
Huh? It's apparently A-OK to continue committing crimes while
incarcerated!

Lana


Quote:

> So I went down the street & then tried to call 911 from a pay phone to
> report my missing kidney but a voice on the line first asked me to
press #90
> which unwittingly gave a bandit full access to the phone line at the
MY
> expense.



Thu, 19 Sep 2002 04:00:00 GMT
 OT-What A life I Am Having!!
Perhaps, perhaps.......to be honest I think of it more like the old Chinese
saying that goes something like "May you live in interesting times" and I
think of  the train analogy as more of a roller coaster..........they are
more fun.
I was using my *dry wit* in my previous statement (just so you viewers dont
think I am soulless cretin)
--
Brav
"I've been thru a lot in my life,
but most of it never happened."
 ~ Mark Twain~


Quote:
> this is a place where our spirits go for vacation. it's all a test to
> toughen us up. you die and wake up and say"that was a good one, or that
was
> a bad one," we're on the train,like the guy wrote last week


> > I sometimes wonder if this isn't hell.......


> > > i've always imagined hell to be a cold, cold place, like where scrooge
> > went
> > > in albert finneys' version of a Christmas Carol.


> > > > I will wait to test that theory thanks.....



> > > > > message on local baptist church marquee"you can't stop, drop, and
> roll
> > > in
> > > > > hell"


> > > > > > Aloha Brav,

> > > > > > Priceless post!! Combines all the most clooless 'net topics into
> > one:
> > > > > > urban legends, virus hoax warnings, chain emails, cutesy
emoticon
> > > > > > figures sent to everyone in the known world, ... and a healthy
> dose
> > of
> > > > > > paranoia, too. {::grinning::}  I don't think you missed a single
> > one.

> > > > > > I appreciate your sense of humor, and I'm glad you found your
old
> > sig.
> > > > > > line - (BTW, you *do* know what happened to Robert Johnson at
the
> > > > > > Crossroads, of course (no urban legend there, uh uh - no way,
> > > nope!!)).

> > > > > > warm aloha,
> > > > > > --
> > > > > > Leola

> > > > > > ~~ What if the hokey pokey really *is* what it's all about?~~


> > > > > > > I was on my way to the post office yesterday morning to pick
up
> my
> > > > case
> > > > > of
> > > > > > > free M&Ms (sent to me because I forwarded an e-mail to five
> other
> > > > people
> > > > > > > celebrating the fact that the year 2000 is "MM" in  Roman
> > numerals)
> > > > when
> > > > > I
> > > > > > > ran into a friend whose  neighbor, a young man, was home
> > recovering
> > > > from
> > > > > > > having been served a rat in  his bucket of Kentucky Fried
> Chicken
> > > > > (which
> > > > > > > is predictable since, as everyone knows, there's no actual
> chicken
> > > in
> > > > > > > Kentucky Fried Chicken, which is why the government made them
> > change
> > > > > their
> > > > > > > name to KFC).

> > > > > > > Anyway, this morning I went to decided  to take a nap before I
> > left
> > > > and
> > > > > when
> > > > > > > I awoke I was in my bathtub and it was full of ice and  I was
> sore
> > > all
> > > > > over,
> > > > > > > and when I got out of the tub, I realized
> > > > > > > that MY KIDNEY HAD BEEN STOLEN.    I saw a note on my mirror
> that
> > > said
> > > > > "Call
> > > > > > > 911!"  but I was afraid to use my phone because it was
connected
> > to
> > > my
> > > > > > > computer and there was a virus on my computer that would
destroy
> > my
> > > > hard
> > > > > > > drive if I opened an e-mail entitled "Join the crew!"   I knew
> it
> > > > wasn't
> > > > > a
> > > > > > > hoax
> > > > > > > because I have a friend who is a computer programmer who is
> > working
> > > on
> > > > > > > software to prevent a global disaster in which all the
computers
> > get
> > > > > > > together and distribute the last week in a mass e-mail from
BILL
> > > GATES
> > > > > > > HIMSELF (who was also promising me a free Disney World
vacation
> > and
> > > > > $5,000
> > > > > > > if I would forward
> > > > > > > the e-mail to everyone I know.)

> > > > > > > So I went down the street & then tried to call 911 from a pay
> > phone
> > > to
> > > > > > > report my missing kidney but a voice on the line first asked
me
> to
> > > > press
> > > > > #90
> > > > > > > which unwittingly gave a bandit full access to the phone line
at
> > the
> > > > MY
> > > > > > > expense. Then reaching into the coin-return slot, I got jabbed
> > with
> > > an
> > > > > > > HIV-infected needle around which was wrapped a note that said,
> > > > "Welcome
> > > > > to
> > > > > > > the world of AIDS."

> > > > > > > Luckily I was only a few blocks from the hospital - the one
> where
> > > the
> > > > > last
> > > > > > > wish of that little boy who is dying of cancer is for everyone
> in
> > > the
> > > > > world
> > > > > > > to send him an e-mail and the American Cancer  Society has
> agreed
> > to
> > > > pay
> > > > > him
> > > > > > > a nickel for every e-mail he receives.   I sent him two
e-mails
> > and
> > > > one
> > > > > of
> > > > > > > them was a bunch of x's and o's in the shape of an angel (if
you
> > get
> > > > it
> > > > > and
> > > > > > > forward it to more than 10 people, you will have good luck but
> for
> > > 10
> > > > > people
> > > > > > > only you will only have OK luck and if you send it to fewer
than
> > 10
> > > > > people
> > > > > > > you will have BAD LUCK FOR SEVEN YEARS).

> > > > > > > So anyway, I tried to drive myself to the hospital tonight;
but
> > on
> > > > the
> > > > > way,
> > > > > > > I noticed another car driving without its lights on.   To be
> > > helpful,
> > > > I
> > > > > > > flashed my lights at him and was promptly shot as part of a
gang
> > > > > initiation.

> > > > > > > Now YOU have to send THIS to all the friends who send you
their
> > junk
> > > > > mail
> > > > > > > and you will receive 4 green M&Ms -- if you don't,  the owner
of
> > > > Proctor
> > > > > and
> > > > > > > Gamble will report you to his Satanist friends  and you will
> have
> > > more
> > > > > bad
> > > > > > > luck:  you will get sick from the Sodium Laureth Sulfate in
your
> > > > > shampoo,
> > > > > > > your spouse/mate will develop a skin rash from using the
> > > > antiperspirant
> > > > > > > which clogs the pores under your arms, you will get deathly
sick
> > > from
> > > > > not
> > > > > > > wiping soda cans with soap and water before drinking from
them,
> > and
> > > > even
> > > > > if
> > > > > > > you do clean the can top carefully, the aspartame in the soda
> will
> > > > give
> > > > > you
> > > > > > > multiple sclerosis...   and the U.S. government will put a tax
> on
> > > your
> > > > > > > e-mails forever.    I know this is all true 'cause I read it
on
> > the
> > > > > > > Internet. & some of it actually happened to me.
> > > > > > > --
> > > > > > > Brav...

> > > > > > > I got to keep movin'
> > > > > > >    I've got to keep movin'
> > > > > > >    blues fallin' down like hail
> > > > > > >    blues fallin' down like hail
> > > > > > > Umm mmm mmm mmm
> > > > > > >   blues fallin' down like hail
> > > > > > >   blues fallin' down like hail
> > > > > > > And the days keeps on worryin' me
> > > > > > >    there's a hellhound on my trail
> > > > > > >    hellhound on my trail
> > > > > > >    hellhound on my trail

> > > > > > > *Hellhound On My Trail*
> > > > > > >     ~Robert Johnson~
> > > > > > > (found my old sig)



Thu, 19 Sep 2002 04:00:00 GMT
 OT-What A life I Am Having!!
http://www.urbanlegends.com/ulz/90pound.html

http://www.snopes.com/inboxer/scams/jailcall.htm


Quote:
> This is no urban legend! I used to work at a VERY large financial
> institution and we CONSTANTLY had phone calls where someone would say
> they were a repair technician from the phone company and request that we
> press 90 and hang up so they could "test the line." A lot of people fell
> for it. I finally got fed up and traced the calls. They were coming from
> a payphone in a prison in upstate New York. I spoke to someone in
> administration there, but they told me they couldn't do anything about
> it because that would be interfering with the prisoners' civil rights!
> Huh? It's apparently A-OK to continue committing crimes while
> incarcerated!

> Lana



> > So I went down the street & then tried to call 911 from a pay phone to
> > report my missing kidney but a voice on the line first asked me to
> press #90
> > which unwittingly gave a bandit full access to the phone line at the
> MY
> > expense.



Thu, 19 Sep 2002 04:00:00 GMT
 OT-What A life I Am Having!!
Yes, I'm familiar with those websites, and yes, it obviously doesn't apply
to residential customers, only where there's a PBX and you have to dial "9"
to get out. But my point is that this practice is EXTREMELY common.

Two lists I'm on received posts on the rat{*filter*}on soda cans and the flesh
eating bacteria on Costa Rican bananas with total seriousness.

Lana

Quote:

> http://www.***.com/

> http://www.***.com/



>> This is no urban legend! I used to work at a VERY large financial
>> institution and we CONSTANTLY had phone calls where someone would say
>> they were a repair technician from the phone company and request that we
>> press 90 and hang up so they could "test the line." A lot of people fell
>> for it. I finally got fed up and traced the calls. They were coming from
>> a payphone in a prison in upstate New York. I spoke to someone in
>> administration there, but they told me they couldn't do anything about
>> it because that would be interfering with the prisoners' civil rights!
>> Huh? It's apparently A-OK to continue committing crimes while
>> incarcerated!

>> Lana



>> > So I went down the street & then tried to call 911 from a pay phone to
>> > report my missing kidney but a voice on the line first asked me to
>> press #90
>> > which unwittingly gave a bandit full access to the phone line at the
>> MY
>> > expense.



Fri, 20 Sep 2002 03:00:00 GMT
 
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