The subject line describes what I think happened.
Here are the symptoms:

I woke up with a swollen area on the upper part of
my posterior, about the size of two quarters.  It did
not hurt; in fact, it was kinda numbed. Over the next few days
the swelling went down, and I applied hydrocortisine, thinking
it was just a bad bite or strange rash of some sort.  Now it
is six days later, the swelling is gone, but there are about
ten or so lumps.  Now, is it possible that a spider or some
other creature found my {*filter*}a particularly nifty place to
lay eggs?  If so, what would the proper treatment be?
Any and all medical advice appreciated (except those
suggesting I have my {*filter*}amputated).
This is a SERIOUS post.

Daniel Fish

IMEDIATELY go and have this X-rayed. Its most likely an implant from some
aliens that visited 7 days ago.  Didn't you watch "Intruders" ;-)

Sorry, couldn't resist your award winning Subject: line

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                                                          Doug Monroe

It has come to my attention that someone has
posted to sci.med, in my name, that I have spider
eggs lodged in my posterior. This is a COMPLETE
fabrication.  I do not, repeat, NOT have spider
eggs in my butt.

They're{*filter*}roach eggs.

Daniel Fish

This is very bad advice.  The implants may be one of the varieties which
obtain energy from X-rays, and this will cause them to grow faster.  Don't
you ever watch late-night television?

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I suggest you change your name.
Maybe "Daniel Spider" ?

RaF